The boarding passes have been printed, the house sitter has been shown where to sit, and the dogs have been told we’re really just stepping out for a few hours and will be right back. But in reality, come the morning sun my wife and I will be on our way to Raleigh, NC, where I have the privilege of being on of the Guests of Honor at Illogicon III.
Here now is my updated and complete schedule:
Friday, January 10th
2:00 p.m. | Smith | Opening Ceremonies
Join us as we kick things off and the convention chair gives Mary Robinette Kowal and I the keys to the city (or something like that).
4:00 p.m. | Reynolds | The Fortunes of Small Press
The standard joke goes like this: Want to make a small fortune with a small press? Easy, start with a large fortune! But once you get past the jokes, what’s involved in actually starting your own press?
Betty Cross, Bill Ferris, Samuel Montgomery-Blinn, Ed Schubert, and me
9:00 p.m. | Reynolds | Lies With Words
The panelists are given a list of obscure and/or obsolete words in advance. One person has the true meaning and the others compose false definition of each words, long or short, simple or complex, as they please. Can the audience tell which is which? Points are Awarded to each panelist for every audience member who buys into his/her lie.
Bill Ferris, Gray Rinehart, Ed Schubert, Mark Van Name, Michael Williams, are the panelists, and I’m the Host!
Saturday, January 11th
10:00 a.m. | Crescent | Reading
Come and hear me read a tale of the Amazing Conroy. One lucky attendee will leave with his/her/hir own plush buffalito! I’ll also talk a bit about my new book coming from Tor. Also, this would also be a good time to bring me things to sign.
12:00 p.m. | Smith | Social Scientists’ Science Fiction
There’s no shortage of science fiction written by authors with Ph.D.s in the “hard sciences” (biology, chemistry, physics), and their expertise show up in everything from world building to alien physiology. But what about authors with doctorates in Psychology, Sociology, Anthropology, Linguistics, Economics, and so on? Is the SF experience redefined when it comes from social scientists instead?
Bill Ferris, Samuel Montgomery-Blinn, Gray Rinehart, Michael Williams, and me
3:00 p.m. | Smith | You Are Getting Sleepy
A few words about common misperceptions of hypnosis (as maintained by media and popular culture), what doesn’t work, and what does, and maybe even a brief demonstration.
This is just me, but soon you too will be part of my army of hypnotized minions.
Sunday, January 12th
1:00 p.m. | Reynolds | Fuck the Universal Translator!
(I can’t believe they let me put “Fuck” in the panel name). A rant about the many reasons why the aliens will not show up speaking perfect English, and other examples of linguistic laziness by science fiction authors.
Bill Ferris, Chris Ross, and me
7:00 p.m. || Closing Ceremonies
A tired (but happy!) con staff gathers to thank everyone for an amazing weekend (and make us give back the key to the city).
That’s my schedule, and right about now you should be asking yourself one question: Who is Bill Ferris and why is he on every panel that I’m on?
Also joining me at the convention will be Barry (my personal, plush buffalito). As I’ve mentioned before, his Facebook page needs more photos, so be sure to pose with him this weekend.