Posts Tagged ‘Klingon’

Klingons and Elephants and Audiobooks, Oh My!

No Comments » Written on December 14th, 2015 by
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J.G. Hertzler

I’ve been keeping this under wraps for a while, but now the tale can be told: The audiobook version of my novel, Barsk: The Elephants’ Graveyard, will be read by none other than the brilliant actor and director, J. G. Hertzler. That’s right, folks, Martok, the galaxy-renowned one-eyed Klingon General, spent much of last week in the studio, tankard of bloodwine close at hand, to record the tale of prophecy and intolerance, loyalty and conspiracy, friendship and the dead. And when you think about it, who better than the Klingon warrior who survived the Dominion War and emerged to lead his people to glory.

Now, I’m not saying that Barsk should necessarily be seen as a Klingon story, but it surely just took a huge step closer. Hmmm… I wonder if there’ll be songs…


Nebula Voting / Hugo Nomination Deadline 2014 Edition

No Comments » Written on March 27th, 2014 by
Categories: Plugs
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If you’re a card-carrying Active or Lifetime member of SFWA :

The deadline for casting your vote for the Nebula Awards (and Norton and Bradbury Awards) is just days away.

Similarly, if you :

* have an attending or supporting LonCon 3 membership, and/or
* had an attending or supporting LoneStar 3 membership, and/or
* have an attending or supporting Sasquan membership:

The deadline for submitting your Nomination Ballot for the Hugo Awards (and Campbell Award) is also about to land.

Specifically, it’s next Sunday, March 30, 11:59pm PDT for the Nebulas, and Monday, March 31, 11:59pm PDT for the Hugos.

To vote online for the Nebulas, SFWA members can go to

To vote online for the Hugos, convention members can go to

And now that we’ve got that covered, let’s shift from Public Service Announcement to Self-Serving Reminder. My novella, “Trial of the Century,” has been nominated for the Nebula Award for BEST NOVELLA.

It’s also eligible for a Hugo Award in that same category.

If you like my work, and you’re empowered to vote or nominate, I hope you’ve read my novella and that you’ll cast your ballot accordingly.

In the event that I actually win either award, I promise to have a Klingon acceptance speech.

Now, go and do your part!

Shatner and me!

No Comments » Written on January 9th, 2014 by
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So here I am in Raleigh, NC for Illogicon, which starts tomorrow. I just did an interview and in that interview I was asked what I thought about another interview, one done quite recently with William Shatner. Here’s the link for that. It seems he’s in town performing his one-man show, Shatner’s World: We Just Live In It, on Sunday at the Memorial Auditorium in Raleigh.

In that interview, they asked him for a comment about the NC councilman who recently quit his job with a resignation letter written in Klingon. Shatner wasn’t impressed. Apparently the interviewer followed up, and mentioned Illogicon and my being their Guest of Honor, calling me a Klingon language authority. Shatner’s response: “It brings to mind what is language, and how is language devised and can you have subtlety in a made-up language? It’s a really interesting creative question.”

I think so too. But then, I also believe it’s not about the language, it’s about the language speaker. Not everyone can do subtle, regardless of what language they speak.

Hmm… I wonder if he’ll be stopping by the convention? That would be fun indeed.

Lawrence’s mid-LoneStarCon3 Update

No Comments » Written on September 1st, 2013 by
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Welcome to September, and Day Four of the Worldcon. Here’s where you can find me for the next two days:

11:00 a.m. (Art Show) – Art Show Docent Tour K
The K stands for Klingon. I’ll be leading confused convention attendees through the show, giving them my perspective on what speaks to a Klingon warrior’s heart. I’m told I will have a balloon tethered to my wrist (you know, just like they do on the Klingon homeworld).

1:00 p.m. (Conference 4, Rivercenter) – Writers’ Workshop Section Q
Matthew Johnson and I will be providing critique to three brave writers. Note: this is not a spectator sport. Only the five of us will be there. But, hey, I thought you’d want to know about it.

5:00 p.m. (007B, Convention Center) – First Contact Without a Universal Translator
Karl Schroeder, Paige E. Ewing, and I will be taunt the audience with our ideas of how to go about making alien contact without any common language elements.

9:00 a.m. (Lobby, Rivercenter – or maybe Riverwalk?) – Strolling with the Stars
My second stroll of the convention. Start your last day with a gentle walk while you chat with such luminaries as James L. Cambias, Shanna Swendson, Howard Tayler, Mel White, David Boop, Toni Weisskopf, Gini Koch, and John Berlyne. Pose for a photo with Barry too, because he loves you!

12:00 p.m. (Exhibit Hall A, Convention Center) – Literary Beer
Sign up to come and hang out with me (and Barry) for an hour and watch me drink a diet coke. I’ll be brining an extra plush buffalito with me to this event and it will go home with one lucky attendee!

Current and Incomplete LoneStarCon 3 Schedule

No Comments » Written on August 13th, 2013 by
Categories: News
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We’re just a few weeks out from the start of this year’s WorldCon, aka LoneStarCon 3, the 71st annual world science fiction convention.

I’ll be there, and the good folks running the show have seen fit to put me on panels so that I can do my dancing bear act (or something like that).

Like many, I’m still waiting to be filled in on the finer points of my schedule, but here’s what I know for now:

Thursday, August 29th:
6:00 – 8:00 p.m. | |Private reception for James Gunn and many of his students.
Shhh… it’s private. Seriously, I’m very happy to get to be a part of honoring this fine writer and teacher.

Friday, August 30th
9:00 – 10:00 a.m. | | Annual Codex Breakfast
Several dozen writers “on the hungry edge of speculative fiction” sate their appetites with breakfast as online acquaintances meet face to face for the first time, and old friends reunite. Also pancakes.

Saturday, August 31st
10:00 – 11:00 a.m. | | SFWA Meeting
It’s been a wild year for SFWA, and I’m sure this will be a “lively” business meeting. It is also the 1st meeting for new president Steven Gould. Show up on time and maybe we’ll even finish on time.

3:00 – 4:00 p.m.| | First Contact in 3..2..1.. (M)
If First Contact were to happen today, and was an open event, how would the human race react? Would we feel inferior, or just try to steal their technology? Might we even attack them? What is the probability of them being hostile, curious, invading, tourists, game hunters, refugees, or would be gods?
with Liz Argall, Jeffrey Shanks, and Martha Wells.

Sunday, March 17th
11:00 a.m. – 12:00 pm | | Art Show Docent Tour for Klingons
A tour through select pieces of the art show which I feel speak to both the warrior’s heart and the poet’s soul of your typical Klingon. Portions of the tour *will* be in Klingon, but translations will be available as needed. Please do not bring your bat’leth, as it tends to upset the art show staff.

1:00 – 3:00 pm | | Writers’ Workshop – Section Q
In the spirit of “paying it forward,” two professional authors serve up insightful critique to three junior writers. Not a spectator sport, but an important part of the my annual Worldcon experience.
I’m privileged to be working with Matthew Johnson. I’m leaving off the names of the three writers we’ve been assigned, to better facilitate their stalking of me.

500 – 6:00 p.m.| | First Contact Without a Universal Translator (M)
How do we establish a common conceptual base to communicate with another species? Sure, we have numbers and the hydrogen atom in common, but how far would that get us in a world of beings who share none of our sensory apparatus?
with Gay Haldeman, Jesi Pershing, and Karl Schroeder.

8:00 p.m. – ??? | | Hugo Awards Ceremony
The voting members of the Worldcon hand out shiny golden rocket ships in a ceremony that’s almost guaranteed to run long. Place your bets early for who will win.

Other bits and pieces that will be added to the above schedule include:

  • Autographing – or as I like to think of it, my annual humbling session.
  • Strolling w/ the Stars – stretch my legs and chat; I’ll try to sneak in two of these.
  • Kaffeeklatche/Literary Beer – or in my case, conversation with fans and Diet Coke.
  • Reading – likely from my new novella, “Trial of the Century” (Conroy fans, take note!)

In addition, there will be quite a few parties to attend, and of course Valerie is planning various fine dining events while we’re in a new city. I have some business lunches to work in as well, and hey, I’d like to catch a few panels and readings myself. Also, Barry is determined to get photographed with SMOFs from each of the competing bid committees!

All in all, it’s going to be glorious (not to mention exhausting)!

I want my MTV (in Klingon!)

No Comments » Written on June 7th, 2013 by
Categories: News
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Get More:
MTV Shows

Last summer during Chicon 7, aka the 70th annual World Science Fiction Convention, aka WorldCon, I wondered into the Press Room and spent half an hour or so with the crew from MTV show Geek!.

Months went by, and every time I queried they assured me they were still editing but they had every intention of using the footage. Eventually though, I gave up.

Well, file me away under “oh ye of little faith,” because apparently back in March four separate, short segments went out on MTV. Assuming I’ve done the link embedding correctly, you should be able to watch one of them at the top of the page.

And before you ask, I have no idea why the WorldCon has become “Wondercon” on the video. Just one of those things.

Into Darkness

No Comments » Written on June 5th, 2013 by
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I had to go into work at the DayJob early today, which meant that I left early too. So, when I returned home I asked Valerie if she wanted to go out to dinner tonight. One thing led to another, and we turned it into a proper and impromptu “date night” and went off for dinner and a movie.

All of which is prelude to explaining that I have no finally seen Star Trek Into Darkness.

I quite enjoyed the film. Especially that bonus scene after the credits when the bridge crew were all eating shwarma.

Hypnosis in Klingon?

No Comments » Written on March 13th, 2013 by
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Last night I was working on some notes for what will eventually be the “Pre-Talk” that goes up on my website, Hypnosis4Writers. Some of those ideas were still bouncing around in my head this morning as I was driving to work, but it must have gotten jumbled with some other musings I was having on the forthcoming How to Speak Klingon: Essential Phrases for the Intergalactic Traveler from Chronicle Books.

The end result had me motoring along through morning traffic talking to myself about hypnosis, in Klingon!

It was mostly the standard things I’d say before doing an induction, things likewhat hypnosis is and what it isn’t. How you can view the process as building a bridge between the conscious mind and the unconscious mind, how hypnosis is not sleep, and how you can’t be made to reveal your darkest secrets under hypnosis (unless of course you want to).

The word for hypnotize is vong, and a hypnotist (one who hypnotizes) is vongwI’.

yab is the word for mind and vul means to be unconscious. In Klingon, stative verbs (that is, verbs which describe a state of being) can in most cases follow a noun to modify it, much like an adjective would in English. Thus yab vul would be understood as the unconscious mind. Klingon also has the suffix -Ha’ which in many cases compares to the English prefix un-, so the conscious mind would be yab vulHa’.

vongwI’ jIH. yablIj ‘oDmeH qavong. yIjot. peghmeylIj Da’angbe’.
I am a hyphotist. In order to mediate with your unconscious mind, I will hypnotize you. Be calm. You will not reveal your secrets.

Because vul isn’t a word I tend to use much (in fact, the only time I can recall having spoken it outloud was when it cropped up one day in my year of posting daily Klingon podcasts (see DaHjaj Hol) so it took me a while to even recall that the language had such a word. Prior to that I was trying out phrases like vemtaHbogh yab and QongtaHbogh yab which would be the waking mind and the sleeping mind, respectively. I like those well enough, but it’s nice to have the word for unconscious handy too. Variety and all that.

Anyway, that’s all the time I have to share these Hypno/Klingon musings with you at the moment, but I thought you might be interested. I mainly wanted to post this so I had a record and reference, in case I forget all about it. I have the suspicion that I might be doing some sort of panel or presentation about all of this next January when I’m one of the GoHs at Illogicon. And who knows, maybe Mary Robinette will work up a puppet show to accompany the whole thing? Now that would be awesome (Dunqu’)