My holiday gift to you, this simple lullaby from the Klingon homeworld.

http://j.mp/soft-targ

Here are the lyrics:

tun targhoy. tuj targhoy. tugh DuchoprupchoH.
Quchchu’ targhoy. Doy’qu’ targhoy. HoH! HoH! HoH!

Here’s the literal transation:
The targgy is soft. The targgy is hot. Soon it will be ready to begin to bite you.
The targgy is clearly happy. The targgy is very tired. Kill! Kill! Kill!

And here’s a singable translation:
Soft targgy. Hot targgy. It will bite you soon.
Happy targgy. Sleepy targgy. Kill! Kill! Kill!

For those who want a bit more insight into the Klingon, here’s how the words break down:

tun – (verb) be soft.

targh – (noun) an animal presumably native to the Klingon homeworld; believed to resemble a cross between a dog and a wild boar.

-oy – (noun suffix) endearment.

Thus targhoy – “targy”

tuj – (verb) be hot.

tugh – (adverbial) soon.

Du- – (prefix) third person singular subject, second person singular object.

chop – (verb) to bite.

-rup – (verb suffix) readiness.

-choH – (verb suffix) change of action.

Thus DuchoprupchoH – It is ready to start to bite you.

Quch – (verb) be happy.

-chu’ – (verb suffix) clearly, perfectly.

Doy – (verb) be tired.

-qu’ – (verb suffix) emphasis.

HoH – (verb) kill.

Note: When dealing with animals, a reduced form of the language, referred to as “Clipped Klingon,” is often seen. Commands, such as Sit!, which in regular speech would require the use of an imperative prefix such as yI- as well as the verb (in this case, ba’), would be reduced to just the verb form when commanding an animal. In this context then, the simple verb HoH could be correctly seen as the command Kill!.

However, readers should not draw any association between this song and the classic Russ Meyer film, Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!, as that would just be silly and wrong.

Thanks to Krikor for providing the plush targ, Diane for providing the photos, and Merle for making it all happen and hosting the party that sparked this whole thing in the first place.

Super colosso thanks to Tim W. Burke for spending the afternoon at my house and pulling the entire video together.