My 2017 Nebula Conference Schedule

No Comments » Written on May 14th, 2017 by
Categories: News
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In a few days I’ll be driving (yes, I said driving) to Pittsburgh, PA for the 51st annual Nebula Conference.

2017 Nebula Conference

The event has been transforming itself in the last few years, taking on more of the feel of a professional conference and not simply a showcase for the nominees of the Nebula Award and the banquet during which some of them will go home with a pretty trophy.

Here’s where I currently expect to be found, though of course this could change.

Thursday, May 18th
8:00 a.m. – 5:00 p.m. | TBA | SFWA Board Meeting
Sorry, not a spectator event. This is the room where it happens.

1:00 p.m. – 1:30 p.m. | Hospitality Suite | Convention Mentor Meet-Up
During the Board’s lunch break I’ll slip away to participate in this meet-up. The SFWA mentor program pairs established writers with early career writers, or people attending the Nebula Award Conference for the first time. Then it’s back to the boardroom.

8:00 p.m. – 9:30 p.m. | Grand Ballroom | Welcome Reception
The first reception of the conference, with more to come!

Friday, May 19th
9:00 a.m. – 10:00 a.m. | Grand Foyer Lobby | Pittsburgh Stroll
Stretch your legs, get your blood flowing, chat with colleagues, or just admire the local architecture.

11:00 a.m. – 12:00 a.m. | Grand Ballroom | Office Hours: Hypnosis!
3:00 p.m. – 4:00 p.m.| Grand Ballroom | Office Hours: Hypnosis!
That’s right, two — count ’em, two — opportunities for you to schedule an appointment or just drop in. I’ll answer your questions and concerns about how hypnosis works and how trance is a natural part of daily life. And yes, ignore what you may have been told — everyone can be hypnotized!

7:30 p.m. – 8:00 p.m. | Grand Ballroom | Nebula Nominee Presentation
Meet this year’s nominees before heading into the Mass Signing

8:00 p.m. – 9:30 p.m. | Grand Ballroom | Mass Signing
Bring me your copies of Barsk or Calendrical Regression (both past Nebula finalists) to sign!

Saturday, May 20th
10:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m. | Grand Ballroom | SFWA Business Meetin
Cat Rambo and the rest of the Board will entertain you with committee reports, etc., and in the second hour answer the question “what can SFWA do for you?”

6:00 p.m. – 7:00 p.m. | Grand Ballroom | Nebula Reception
We clean up pretty good. Come, mingle, pose for selfies, and wish the nominees luck!

7:00 p.m. – 10:00 p.m. | Grand Ballroom | Nebula Awards Banquet
Chicken or Beef? Neither? Okay, I’ll be having the veggie entree personally. But it’s not about the food. Come celebrate friends and colleagues as we honor the best of our best.

When I’m not otherwise attending programming (I don’t currently have anything scheduled for Sunday), I’ll likely be hanging out in the SFWA Hospitality Suite, chilling at the bar, or typing away frantically on a tablet in the lobby. Drop by and say “howdy.”

Eating Authors: Kelly Robson (Campbell Award nominee)

No Comments » Written on May 8th, 2017 by
Categories: News, Plugs
Kelly Robson

After a week off, we once again resume our annual tradition of highlighting this year’s Campbell nominees. Already reporting on their most memorable meals: Ada Palmer, Sarah Gailey, and Malka Older. Still no word from either J. Mulrooney or Laurie Penny, but their names are on the ballot so please check them out all the same. Meanwhile, for this week’s EATING AUTHORS entry, let’s focus on Kelly Robson.

You should know Kelly for her short fiction. More to the point, unless you were living under a rock last year, you’ve read her novella Waters of Versailles which appeared at and won the Aurora award, as well as picking up nominations for the Nebula, World Fantasy awards. In addition, Kelly also took home a nomination for the Sunburst and Sturgeon awards last year. So, yeah, you kind of get an idea of why she’s up for the Campbell this year.

And, regardless of what happens in Helsinki, Kelly returns to in a few months with a brand new novella — heads up, nominators! Gods, Monsters, and the Lucky Peach promises to be a time travel tour du force. Don’t miss it!

Read the rest of this entry »

Eating Authors: Sarah Gailey (Campbell Award nominee)

No Comments » Written on April 17th, 2017 by
Categories: News
Sarah Gailey

The Hugo finalists were announced this month, which of course means I immediately began scrambling to continue this blog’s time honored tradition of contacting all the nominees for the Campbell Award for Best New Writer — something I’ve done for seven years now — and invite them to share the telling of their most memorable meal. And, as sometimes happens, one of this year’s nominees, Ada Palmer, has already been here (last May, in fact). I’m still waiting to hear back from nominees J. Mulrooney and Laurie Penny and I hope they can spare the time for us all. Nominees Malka Older and Kelly Robson have already responded to my queries and will be featured here over the next few Mondays (with a possible break for another author with a debut novel), but we start with today’s EATING AUTHOR guest, Sarah Gailey.

You’re more likely to know here for her nonfiction — she’s a frequent essayist for and a past nominee for the Best Related Work Hugo Award — but that’s probably going to change when River of Teeth comes out next month. And check out her website where you’ll find links to a wide assortment of her shorter fiction.

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My 2017 Albacon Schedule

No Comments » Written on March 28th, 2017 by
Categories: News
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March has gotten away from me and is almost out the door. But before it’s completely gone, I’ll be taking a roadtrip up to Albacon where my friend, Chuck Gannon is the Guest of Honor. It’s been a few since I’ve been to this convention (the last time I was there it was still being held in October!) and I’m looking forward to a weekend with friends and colleagues. Oh yeah, I’m the convention’s designated “RoastMaster” so I’ve got that going for me.

Here’s my schedule for those of you who wish to find me.

Friday, March 31st
8:00 – 8:55 p.m. | Colonie | Ice Cream Social
I’ve been off most dairy (and sugar and flour and land-based proteins) for the past four weeks. So come by and watch me get a sugar rush like I haven’t experienced since childhood!

Saturday, April 1st
3:00 – 3:25 p.m. | Hotel Bar | Reading
If everyone there has already read Barsk: The Elephants’ Graveyard, I’ll read a snippet from the opening of the sequel (now sitting on my editor’s desk).

4:00 – 4:55 p.m. | Hotel Lobby| Signing
This is your chance to come by and have me sign all the things! And too, I’ll have a few copies of Bars on hand, in case you’ve forgotten to bring one of your own.
with Ryk E. Spoor

8:00 – 8:55 p.m. | Colonie | Charles Gannon Roast
The convention asked me to write the appreciation of Chuck for the program book. Now I have to repudiate all the nice things I said there.
with Alex Shvartsman and Ken Burnside

Sunday, April 2nd
10:00 – 10:55 a.m. | Colonie | Tales of the Less-than-Consolidated Tech Republic
Contributors to the forthcoming Consolidated Tech Republic Anthology will discuss working in Charles Gannon’s world.
with Charles Gannon, Alex Shvartsman, and Robert E. Waters

As you can see, I am not heavily programmed. So look for me in the bar. Better yet, invite me out for a meal!

See you in Albany.


No Comments » Written on March 17th, 2017 by
Categories: News

Today is the deadline for Hugo nominations. I spent most of 2016 traveling promoting Barsk so I have no fiction out there for your consideration.


If you’ve enjoyed my weekly blog series, EATING AUTHORS, well then this would be your chance to throw a Hugo nom toward it.

I believe the series, EATING AUTHORS, is eligible in the Best Fanzine category.

And too, that I am therefore eligible in the Best Best Fan Writer category.

I’ve been sharing the results of pestering authors about their most memorable meals every Monday since June 6th, 2011 (with only two exceptions), giving you a peek into the live and minds of world famous writers and brand new authors, because it’s been a vehicle for “paying it forward” too.

So, with that in mind, if you’ve an open slot on your Hugo ballot in either or both categories (and so many of you do!) then please, do your part to either get me a new paperweight for my desk or send me to the Hugo Losers Party in Helsinki. Either way, thanks.

And remember, the deadline to make (or make changes to) your nominations is today, 17 March 2017 at 11:59pm Pacific Daylight Time (2:59am Eastern Daylight Time, 06:59 Greenwich Mean Time, 08:59 in Finland, all on 18 March).

Something Fishy Indeed

1 Comment » Written on March 3rd, 2017 by
Categories: News
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My wife has been struggling with a number of health issues, and we’ve been through a wide variety of tests. I had my money on Lyme disease, but no the tests ruled that out. Nor was it Fibromyalgia (and it wasn’t Lupus). Earlier this week we were able to get in to see an Integrative Medicine specialist. He seemed confident that he had an explanation for all of Valerie’s ailments and he was quite convincing. Among the treatments he’s prescribing is a move away from land-based animal protein and a move toward raw vegetables.

Nothing is more important to me than Valerie’s health and happiness, and I know firsthand how difficult such a dramatic change in lifestyle can be, particularly when attempting it by yourself. Which is why I am taking the plunge with her.

I will be easing into the dietary habits of a pescetarian. This is apt to be particularly challenging as I do not like most fruits and vegetables.

Those of you who have followed my exploits and know of my writing “process” are likely aware that most afternoons (after I’ve finished my hours at the DayJob) I plant myself in a corner booth at a local KFC and write. This means that I generally eat fried chicken (in one manifestation or another) at least five days a week. Also, while pounding away on my keyboard at KFC, I will get up and refill my 16oz cup of diet cola numerous times, to the tune of at least half a gallon of the stuff each day (plus whatever I may have consumed in the morning at the DayJob and what I might drink later when I get home). This won’t be happening any more (and my sister Adrienne will likely find the timing of this amusing). No more trips to KFC. Yesterday was my last fried chicken. The poor employees at KFC who know me by name will likely assume I’ve died.

I’ll still drink the occasional Diet Coke, at least for now, but I’ll be transitioning to water or fruit juice and the like for most of my beverages.

We have a lot of other animal protein stocked up (e.g., a case of vacuum-packed, smoked duck breasts!) that I will work my way through in the weeks ahead, but I’ll be transitioning to fish and that’s no hardship for me. Also I’ll be eliminating most sugar and flour from my diet and replacing it with a lot more salad and other vegetables. Terrifying stuff.

I’ll also be saying goodbye to eggs and dairy. Cheese will be particularly missed. Yesterday, I was at a meeting hosted by Temple Hospital and they had a small spread for the attendees. To my own amazement, I bypassed the cheese platter and filled a small plate with some grapes, fresh broccoli, and a carrot slice. I had never previously eaten raw broccoli and I was surprised to find I liked it.

I baked up some swai fillets this morning for tonight’s dinner. And right now instead of sitting and working at a KFC, I’m sitting at Bryn + Dane’s and drinking a “Mo’ Green” smoothie. I’ve never had one before, but allegedly all it contains is kale, wheatgrass, pineapple and mango.

If all these changes don’t kill me, I suspect I’ll be considerably healthier the next time you see me.

My Final VancouFur 2017 Schedule

No Comments » Written on March 1st, 2017 by
Categories: News
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Weeks ago I posted my tentative schedule for this convention, promising to post an update when things firmed up some. That’s what you’re looking at now, and you’ll see that almost nothing has changed (though now I have room assignments for you). That says a lot about the folks handling programming. Well done.

Not content to rest on their laurels, all of a day after I had my initial scheduling information they loaded me up with their online scheduling utility. So, I’ve had this a bit and wanted to wait in case they had any last minute changes. Sorry, that’s not their style, they got it all right the first time. So now, without further ado, here’s were you can find me during my Author GoH gig at VancouFur.

Thursday, March 9th
6:00 p.m. – 7:00 p.m. | Grand Ballroom A | Opening Ceremonies

Friday, March 10th
1:00 p.m. – 2:00 p.m. | Boardroom A | Author Meet & Greet
I’ll probably only be at this for the first half hour, because at 1:30 I have to go to…

1:30 p.m. – 2:30 p.m. | Tivoli’s II | Ice Cream Social
And I’ll probably only be at this for the first half hour as well, because at 2:00 I have to go to…

2:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. | Fraser | State of Anthropomorphic Writing
with Tony Greyfox and Ocean Tigrox

3:00 p.m. – 4:00 p.m. | Fraser | Klingon Language!
Come by and ask questions or just listen to me tell stories from more than two decades of spreading Klingon around the world.

Saturday, March 11th
11:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m. | Fraser | Language and SF
I talk about language and linguistics at almost every convention I attend, and it’s never the same thing twice because language is so awesome!

2:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m. | Fraser | Q&A Reading w/ Lawrence M. Schoen
I’ll read a bit from the sequel to Barsk, and then answer your questions about that book, other stories, novellas, and novels I’ve written, about writing in general, or most anything you want to ask me.

4:00 p.m. – 5:00 p.m. | Fraser | Advantages of Small Press Publishing
I’ve sold short stories to a couple dozen small press anthologies. My first two novels came out from a small press. I run a small press of my own. And I’m on the Board of Directors for SFWA where we talk about small press contracts and such. So, come by and let’s kick around some of the pros and cons of small press publishing.

5:00 p.m. – 7:00 p.m. | Grand Ballroom A | GOH Dinner
This seems like a good thing for me to attend. I’m a big fan of dinner. What’s portion size like in Canada? If you sit next to me, can I eat off your plate too?

7:00 p.m. – 8:00 p.m. | Grand Ballroom A | Variety Show
I expect to be in attendance, likely because I ate too much at the dinner to be able to move yet. (It’s your fault. I can’t believe you let me eat off your plate like that).

Sunday, March 12th
12:00pm – 1:00pm | Boardroom A | SFWA Q&A
The fine folks at VancouFur have graciously provided me some space to hang out and answer questions about the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America for anyone who might be interested in what they do, what resources they make available, what the perks of membership include, and what you can avail yourself of without even joining! So come on by.

When I’m not doing programming, I’ll likely be drinking a Diet Coke, wandering around in the public spaces, chilling at the bar, or possibly typing away frantically on a tablet (in either a public space, or the bar). Feel free to come over and say “hi” if you like.

Farewell, Richard

No Comments » Written on February 24th, 2017 by
Categories: News
Richard Hatch

I only just learned that actor Richard Hatch (shown here as a Klingon in Prelude to Axanar) died on February 7th. He was 71.

Back in March of 1999, I was in Sydney, Australia as the guest of a convention called BEST OF BOTH WORLDS 5. William Shatner was headlining the convention, but also on the bill were Richard, Robin Curtis, and me.

Bill was staying in a separate hotel from the rest of us, but I spent a lot of time hanging out with Richard. Highlights included watching the Oscars in his hotel room and listening to snarky stories about various nominees.

The three actors had been in Sydney for a day doing press, but I only arrived late in the afternoon the day before the convention was to start because I’d just flown in from New Zealand where I’d spent several days opening a Star Trek exhibit at the national museum in Wellington.

Richard, Robin, and I were the honored guests at a special banquet in the hotel. I’d met Robin before at another con and we got along quite well, so our hosts put us at the same table. Richard was oof at another table, holding court. Because of the timing of things, Richard and I hadn’t even been introduced yet, and when Robin and I sat down at our table I remember her telling me “not to start anything” with Richard at dinner.

No one told Richard though, so he started it.

Over the course of the next hour, we took turns playing a series of jokes on one another. He took my dinner away when I wasn’t looking. Then, while he was up from his table and talking to someone across the room, I removed his place setting and chair, and had everyone at his table shift so the round of eight became a round of seven and it was like he’d never been there. In retaliation, he had a member of the hotel staff come up to me to inform me I had phone call from the states, and that I could take it downstairs at the front desk. I rushed down, only to find a note in bad Klingon that basically said “ha ha, we got you.”

When I returned to the banquet room Richard was grinning. I told him how relieved I was that the call was a fake because my father was very ill (which was true) and the only reason someone would be calling me from the US would be to tell me he had died. Richard stopped laughing, and we sat down and began to chat.

I asked him why he’d started in like he had, when we’d never even formally met. I will never forget his answer. He said, “Lawrence, you just looked like someone who would be fun to play with.”

And, on the last night of the con, after everything was over, we went out drinking. I don’t usually drink, but I got drunk that night, and Richard and I wandered around Sydney harbor singing show tunes.

Goodbye, Richard. Thank you for the memories. You were fun to play with.